What did the Trojans ever do for us ?

Running whilst hungover is not in any training schedule I have seen.

It's not very easy either.
Unfortunately, It appears to be a normal part of Christmas season training. I feel a sense of guilt about not training a couple of times a week, so this must continue, but I also am now swimming against the tide of lunches and seasonal drinks and losing.

I decide that Canute could not hold back the tide, nor shall I try.

Instead I shall explore a variety of hangover cures to find out which goes best with exercise the morning after.

There are three, after extensive (i.e. google search) research which seem viable for me;

1. Take a shot of neat oxygen. I understand from medical friends that this cure is used by many junior doctors after a heavy night out. A little worrying, but if it is good enough for a medical professional then it's good enough for me.

2. Eggs, bananas, fruit juice and glucose together replace a lot of the items your body loses when drinking alcohol. I have tried this route only this morning, and I can confirm that I feel quite a bit brighter only two hours after their consumption. I consumed the items separately this morning, so I shall press on with my research and use my smoothie machine to combine them all in one drink next time. At the very least it will give an unloved kitchen accessory a rare run-out.

3. More alcohol. Specifically a Bloody Mary. Apparently the vodka in it in some way 'tricks' the body into absorbing the good things in the tomato juice. An alcoholic version of the Trojan horse - whilst the liver and kidney draw swords to take on Captain Vodka, the other ingredients slip past and enter the bloodstream quickly making you feel better.
My history teacher at school always said that the past teaches us valuable lessons about the present. If the Greeks sacked Troy using this slight of hand, then I feel that a cheeky Bloody Mary in the morning can only be good for me.

There is a fourth option, of course - don't have a drink in the first place.

Sounds the hardest of the lot to me.

Non-starter.

Right, where does one buy oxygen from ?

Does running make you a Buddhist ?

You may be reading this blog and thinking that I haven't done any running at all. I hardly mention it.

Running, in itself, is a bit dull. I don't mean that in a bad way, but it won't make for very good copy as a blog if I describe every run.

But I noticed something the other day as I was running. It was a beautiful, crisp, winter morning. The sun was blazing down and I was running along a road with a superb view up into the Chiltern Hills.

It was a morning which grabs you, shakes you, and tells you how lucky you are to be alive.

After about 30 minutes jogging I realised that I had spent the time jogging and thinking about nothing.

Nothing at all.

I had cleared my mind completely and just jogged.

I forgot about everything for 30 minutes.

I used to work with a guy who claimed to be a Buddhist. He talked a great deal about meditation and achieving a zen-state by trying to clear your mind of all thoughts.

I think I did that jogging the other morning. I was obviously in state of Zen.

What an interesting thought - I shall ask other joggers whether this is normal for them too.

I saw one woman jogging along the embankment the other day with a cigarette. I probably won't ask her about Zen.

Perhaps I am on the first stage to enlightenment and Nirvana.

Perhaps I can master levitation next ?

If I can, it will make the marathon an awful lot easier.

Kaiser Wilhelm, Santa Claus and my thumbs

Training in December is not easy.
I am being hampered by three adversaries in my ongoing quest for fitness and weight loss.

Firstly Kaiser Wilhelm.

He is to blame for daylight saving. In 1916, Germany and its allies in WW1 decided to change the clocks so that less coal would be burned by the populace and saved instead for the war effort. Daylight saving means any sensible training must take place in the dark during the winter. This is not only depressing, but also a bit dangerous if your eyesight is as poor as mine.

Secondly, Santa Claus is coming to town, as you may have noticed. In fact, I saw my first Christmas Tree in a hotel reception in September. I hesitate to say, "it comes earlier every year" in case I end up sounding like my parents. But September ? Really ?


Christmas brings severe challenges for the weak-willed glutton  - of which I am one. I am trying to lose weight for goodness sake. I went to my first Christmas meal with old school friends and their families the other weekend. The tables were laden, positively bowing, under the weight of Xmas hams, turkey, and assorted seasonal goodies...

And several deserts - including a cake made with two entire boxes of chocolates as a topping. As I note that my December diary has several extensive lunches already slotted in, I fear my waistline, which was showing some signs of receding under the training regime, may not trim down as fast as I would like.

I have also noticed that our house has started to acquire little boxes of After 8's, Chocolate Oranges and Matchmaker's on various surfaces. These items have a direct correlation with the arrival of Christmas, and I almost absent-mindedly find myself dipping into them en route to the kitchen or dining room. Devil's work they are, these nibbles.

Finally, I have had two instances of 'reflex texting' in the last two weeks. This is the instant response to a text from my wife over which only my thumbs have control and my brain does not. It goes something like this, usually around 8pm, when on my train back home from work...

ME : What's for dinner ?
WIFE : Haven't made anything yet been busy with kids
ME : Shall I buy something to cook when I get in
WIFE : It will be too late by the time we eat
ME : I have only had a sandwich today
WIFE : Take out ?
ME : Kebab ?

The last one is the reflex text - I am trying to give them up. But it's so hard. The Government should do leaflets on the NHS.